so this morning i got to really sleep in...it was amazing...11 or so, longest of the summer...and i couldnt of been happier...well i definately could be...

you see at 6:45 i got up to see Christy off...once again she leaves and i stay...

its a tough world to live away from love...or atleast away from the one i love...

well life moves...and so does god...its a cool thing...but not always easy...

what holds us together...moving us forward...lifting us up and giving us joy...

there is life in pain...life in peace...life is everywhere...i ask for life...

what consumes us...filling our minds with desire...making us sacrifice all...

passion is pain...and pain passion...



as i sit here doodling my thoughts in my living room...my parents are watching a movie...i aught to be going to bed...but anyways whatever they're watching is quite sad...religiously sad...but what i just heard made me laugh inside...so thus i shall share it with you...
"you know whats worse than drinking to forget?"
"no, that i dont know"
"forgetting to drink...yes, thats a bloody hell"



sorry for the distraction...but i feel the moments im most alive are when i smile...not always on in the outside...but the inside...you know the joyeous feeling...thats where i am right now...

so today i was able to interract with God...along with my sister rachel, ashlyn, and my brother (more of a spiritual father) steve...its a wonder why i dont fill my days with conversations such as these...i look for things like this often, but how often do you find yourself chatting with two friends and your pastor...its actually becoming more frequent for me...but to experience it again was a real treat...pastors should spend more time with us other folk in the congregation in preparation for sermons/teachings/whatever you like to call the Sunday message...a humble heart...the heart of a servant...

i love the fact that my pastors are accessible as well as hungry for community...im learning that nothing separates us from our pastors...Gods grace covers us so much...

ive never been happier in my relationship with Christy...the love of God does amazing things...i am joyous